12 Days of Tacky Christmas Day 3

Tacky Christmas Hall of Fame Winner #3
Sweatsock Stockings

The sweatsocks were hung by the chimmney with care
with hopes that "Tough Actin' Tinactin" soon would be there.

12 Days of Tacky Christmas Day 2

Tacky Christmas Hall of Fame Winner #2
Rudolph the Red-Nosed Car

Apparently, the wreath was not enough.

Now we have to invite the favored deer to play his games in the traffic.

Red Light, Green Light . . . Frogger . . . Road Rage.

Sadly, I must admit that I have seen this in person . . . and with one antler missing. . . so sad.

12 Days of Tacky Christmas Day 1

It's the most wonderful time of the year . . .

Christmas is full of joy and wonder.

It's a time of celebrating the things that we hold most dear.

Unfortunately, nothing brings out the boatloads of tackiness

more than a little decking the halls.

For the next 12 days, I will expose this year's hall of fame of

Feliz Navidad faux pas as I see them.

If you spot a holiday offender, send it my way.

We've got to take a stand against these things.

Tacky Christmas Hall of Fame Winner #1

Santa Pants

The Santa Pants are generally used as a party favor.

Now, let's just think about this for a moment.
There are so many ways that this could go.

"Hey, thanks for coming to our party! Be sure and take home the treats in Santa's pants."

"Kids, Grandma has treats for you. Go look in Santa's pants."

And what are you going to do if your favorite treat happens to be chocolate covered raisins?

Seeing the Big Guy

We came . . .

We sat . . .

We planned our future therapy . . .

Where is my adorable smiling boy?

He has been replaced by Bambi on opening day of hunting season.

In between takes he buried his face in my shoulder in total humiliation.

By the second photo, he seems reassured that we aren't going to abandon him,

but he is still concerned that we have lost our minds.

Happy Holidays from the Funny Farm!

Muff Maidens

Why, yes, I do embarrass myself by request. I told Erin that I had to pick between two pictures of us for my last post and this one lost. But apparently, I am feeling entirely too classy and feel the need to bring myself down a few notches. Two words - ear muffs.

The Battle is On

The Battle of the Naptime Pacifier is upon us. We knew it was time when the little guy started asking for it . . . in his not-so-nice voice. To his credit, the nighttime paci has been gone for well over a year, but naptime was always a huge struggle. Now the pacifier must be eliminated . . . and we just hope nap won't be eliminated as well.

Score: Parents 2, Pacifier-lover 0

Naptime: 1:45 for 2 days

Warriors: Daddy Khan, Grammy the Great, Mommy the Weepy

The picture above is of the pacifier tree at the Skansen Zoo in Sweden. Apparently, there is a big ceremony where kids give their pacifiers to the baby animals. Hmmm . . . odd, but apparently effective.

Random-ness about me

So several months ago, my friend Erin tagged me for 6 Random Things about Me. It's taken me many moons to come up with 6 random things about myself, because, well, obviously, I am so un-random. I have NEVER been known to interupt some important conversation with an interesting tidbit of information about me. And I certainly have never had to be reminded that people are confused when I expect them to join a conversation already in progress . . .in my head. Anyway, to reward Erin for letting me play, I give you this little blast from the past.

6 Random Things about Me

I was tagged by Erin

1. I LOVE pumpkin. Even more than pumpkin, I love pumpkin flavored things. Pumpkin Lattes, pumpkin doughnuts, pumpkin bread, pumpkin dip, pumpkin pie, pumpkin custard, pumpkin creamer . . . stop me before I go Bubba on you (shrimp gumbo, shrimp etouffee, shrimp cocktail . . . )! Fall and I have a tenuous relationship. Several tragic things happen every year this time. Namely, daylight dwindles and cold arrives. But pumpkin products, they make Fall livable and, dare I say, maybe even lovable. We carve pumpkins every year and I even dressed Little J up as a pumpkin for his first Halloween. It's the best gourd I know.

2. My ultimate resource material is Wikipedia. I didn't really realize my dependence on the wiki wonder, until I presented a friend with my latest gem of knowledge and her first response was, "did you get that from Wikipedia?" Well, yes, yes I did. My latest research topics: the origin of the term "Black Irish" and the storyline for Will Smith's new movie 7 Pounds.

3. I am a fashion disaster. See exhibit A above. I am wondering if I thought there would be an opportunity to be in a Kris Kross video later. I try, I really do; but more often than not, I am standing in my closet glaring at all my clothes, willing them to morph into some magical outfit. Even more insulting is the fact that I work for the retailer who considers it its mission to dress middle America. In the words of my friend Randa, as we were waiting for our friends in a cutting edge fashion boutique, "my wardrobe consists of colored t-shirts".

4. I love to write. I love the power of expression through the written word. I am fascinated by how one can arrange words in order to share all the complexity that occurs in the mind. I am in love with how words can tumble together and take the reader on a ride through the highs and lows, the speedy and the plodding, the brilliant and the mundane. Someday, I hope to do something with all the words that are stored up in me, but until then I will settle for unloading them on you, my readership, of, what, 2?

5. I am cold . . .all the time. I consider anything below 80 degrees downright chilly. I wear a jacket 10 months out of the year . . . indoors. I consider long underwear and those hand warmer packets some of the best inventions ever. I am thrilled beyond imagination when I think about my heated car seats. Some say luxury; I say necessity, as steering is difficult when one's hands are shivering. The phrase "cold hands, warm heart" has ceased to comfort me long ago.

6. I love Calvin and Hobbes comics. I think it is a look into my future.

Tagging is serious business. There are rules. Here they are. And I tag

Vampirates and Belly Bees

The Brez Buzz

Aday in Bloom

and anyone else with randomness to spare

Here are the rules...

1. Link to the person who tagged you.

2. Post the rules on your blog.

3. Write six random things about yourself.

4. Tag six people at the end of your entry.

(Yes, I can count. I'm being flexible.)

5. Let each person know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.

6. Let the person who tagged you know your entry is up.

7. Best rule: only do it if it will be fun!